is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
