Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
