Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Randomize
