but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
honey bunches of taint.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
