Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
