I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
