Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize