i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
its not stalking. its research.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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