Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
