Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
