fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
