How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
