Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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