I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
