She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Found the puke drawer
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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