i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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