I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
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