you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
