Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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