chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
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