i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Randomize
