I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize