I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
