She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
