are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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