I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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