Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
