Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
