Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize