it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
