She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
3 2 1 whiskey
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
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