Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
