the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
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