Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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