Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
