How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize
