I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize