..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
