real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
