ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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