i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
