Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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