dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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