And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
