well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
