rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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