I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
