It's Friday. Sex?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
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