I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
