He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize