Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
